• Services
  • News
  • Contact
  • Reviews
  • Pay Tuition
  • Membership
Menu

Kids Cooperate

Calm Confident Connected

Your Custom Text Here

Kids Cooperate

  • Services
  • News
  • Contact
  • Reviews
  • Pay Tuition
  • Membership

How to Go From Pessimist to Optimist in 3 Steps

May 12, 2017 Aaron Weintraub

Optimists are healthier, happier, and more successful than pessimists and there's good news, optimism is a skill you can learn.

Many people think that optimism means unflagging positive thinking but that is neither possible nor true. Being an optimist is about how you process adversity. While a pessimist tends to internalize and generalize negative experiences and externalize and contextualize positive ones, an optimist does the opposite. For example, while a pessimist may feel, after a poor grade, that they are unable to learn and bad a math, an optimist would recognize that perhaps they hadn't studied enough or taken care of their health the day before and look for an opportunity to do better next time.

You are probably wondering "How do I learn this magical mindset?" Great, you are already thinking like an optimist because while a pessimist sees the world and themselves as fixed and static, an optimist has a growth mindset. Here are three steps to becoming an optimist.

1. Be a scientist with your thoughts and feelings. Look for evidence as to whether your negative thought is true. If the thought is "nobody cares about me", try to identify a few people who do care about you, thereby disproving the truth of your thought.

2. Be a detective with your thoughts and feelings. Once you establish that there is no evidence to support your negative thought, look for alternative explanations. If it is untrue that "nobody cares about you", perhaps you can identify that negative interaction that led to you feeling so badly about yourself.

3. Be a bouncer with your thoughts and feelings. Ask yourself whether the negative thought is serving you in any positive way. If it isn't, show it the door. Some untrue negative thoughts such as "all snakes are dangerous" might serve you by keeping you cautious, but most negative thoughts don't keep you safe, make you happy, or promote positive behavioral changes. If tats the case than stop giving it your energy and attention.

In Emotional Intelligence, Tips and Tools, Theory
← 3 Ways to Build Self ControlThe End (of the School Year) is Near! →

Powered by Squarespace

Google+